For the first time in a while I entered Cracked Flash Fiction with my tale Beware A Travelling Salesman’s in Expensive Clothes. You can either click on the link and read it on the Cracked website or click below. Either way I hope you hope my cautionary tale about Travelling Salesmen!
Beware A Travelling Salesmans In Expensive Clothes
I leaned against the tree with a sigh. Well it wasn’t much of a tree anymore, more a charred lump, like everything else around me. The reasons smoked gently in front of me.
I’d purchased the three eggs off a rather over the top gentlemen a couple of nights ago at the weekly market. His stall was new. They stand out more and this one certainly did. The gold and purple silks flowed over polished tent poles covered in delicately cravings of Eastern dragons fighting Samurai with drawn katana. His main ware was supposed dragon eggs, cheap as well. Symbols, the language of the Eastern dragons the salesman claimed in a tone , as if everyone knees there were thousands of known dragon languages around the world. This ludicrous fact mixed with robes too expensive and clean for a travelling salesmen, said this man was clearly a charlatan. However his eggs were pretty and there was a space above my hearth needing filled.
On the morning of their fourth day in my home, I found them split in two. I rang the servant bell hard demanding to know which one had carried out such a foul act. None of them opened up and I sent them away to think up a suitable punishment. Fortunately for both my staff and I – a gentleman of my standing does not punish his servants for innocent deeds – I saw the fire embers swim. Through the ash, three small lizard heads appeared from the white-silver flakes. A match head of flame rolled out of the largest one’s mouth alighting last night’s fire. I’ve never heard a lizard giggle. Each note of merriment resulted in more fire and before too long i found myself in my present situation sighing against a charred lump of tree.